Knowing the Tao of the Dow                    

Riding the market is easy; just watch the prez     Jan. 21-Jan. 28, 1999

Vue Magazine - Edmonton

By JARON SUMMERS

History brims with cautionary tales of bad investments. A few decades ago, the Hunt brothers tried to corner the silver market. They drove the price up from $6 to $52, then lost a billion when it collapsed. Those stupid Texans.

Pacific Rim counties are in financial ruin right now because investors got carried away. Those stupid Asians.

Hundred of years ago there was the Dutch Tulip Disaster. People invested in tulip bulbs, bidding up the price of a single tulip bulb to over $5,000; many wound up losing their life savings. Those stupid Dutch.

The October 19, 1987 stock market crash sucked $1 trillion off the value of all U.S. stocks as the Dow Jones plummeted 22.6 per cent--a record percentage loss for the blue-chip index. Those stupid Americans--in general.

In today’s heady high-tech markets, investors have driven up the price of cyber stocks. Amazon shares, for instance, have skyrocketed from $20 to over $300.

As long as most people keep investing, the market will go up. When most people sell, the market will crash. And it will crash like the hammers of hell. It will be a bloodbath of unbelievable proportions.

Amazon will inevitably fall to $25 or less. Pundits will say, "I saw it coming--after all, the Amazon River is one of the most deadly in the world. It is filled with crocodiles and piranhas." People will say, "Those stupid Amazon investors."

Financial pundits are afraid to say anything now because most of them have all their retirement money in the market. Who can resist the chance to double your money in a month when the banks only pay four per cent?

If you can manage the trick of selling your $100 stock just before the crash, then buying back in at 10 cents on the dollar and waiting for the stock to go up again (which it will), you could turn your nest egg into a golden egg!

For once, Ford avoids taking a tumble

The so-called experts say that no one can predict a bull or a bear market because there are too many variables to consider. I don’t believe this. I had a roommate in college who went on to become an advisor to the President of the United States. One day he was accompanying former President Ford to Japan. The plane stopped in Guam. Ford got off the plane, made a call and warned my friend the market would crash within 36 hours. My friend sold all of his stocks hours before the ’87 crash. He became a very rich man. Later he got divorced. He is now broke.

So what do we learn from all of this?

The big players always get out in time and buy back in when the market is low. Since the president is the most powerful man on earth, he is included in the loop. After all, it’s good to have him on your side if you’re ever caught.

Now what would the president do if he knew the market was going to crash?

In-the-pendant counsel

When the stock market crashes, gold will shoot up. The president, being a shrewd investor, will buy a gold pendant for his daughter as soon as he hears the stock market is in trouble.

Watch for him to buy that pendant. Then, sell all your stock. Within days, possibly hours, the market will crash and you can buy back in for a dime on the dollar.

Don’t be a stupid Asian, Dutchman, Texan, American-in-general or Amazon investor. Send for my special newsletter on how to triple your money every 15 minutes in which I reveal all my secrets. The price is $10,000. For overnight FedEx delivery, add $10. All I want is to help you grow richer.

To read about my adventures in the Amazon River, go here.